Little Blessings

This week's prep day was really hard for us. It felt like we'd never get there. It was just one thing after the other and everyone was stressed out. I had a doctor's appointment which totally put a kink in our plans, and then when I got home I had forgotten to stop at the store! 

I so wanted this shabbat to be special. Our last few have been a bit rough and didn't go as we had hoped. We weren't getting the full shalom of Elohim's presence! Thankfully it's not up to us to make shabbat holy, but we do need to fully enter into His rest. 

In spite of all of the struggles I was determined to make sure that we fully opened ourselves up to welcome the Divine. So as my hubby ran out to grab a few things I set the table and lit the candles. I even let each of my girls light their own candles for the first time. Then we sang L'cha Dodi and the girls danced around the kitchen. 

Once my husband came home it was time for kiddush and the blessings. But before he started he gave another attempt at blowing our shofar. In the past he had not been able to get any sounds out of it. It always sounded like he was just blowing air through a tube. He's practiced and practiced but still he wasn't able to get it. So much so that he wasn't even really interested in trying to blow it for real tonight. But with a little prompting he gave it another shot. 

At first it just sounded like air. But then it happened. The most beautiful sound came out of it, he finally did it! We were all so excited and it just felt like the most perfect start to having a wonderful shabbat. After that my hubby proceeded to bless us all and it was exactly what we had hoped for. 

Sometimes in life we just need those little blessings. Those things that happen and let us know that we are not forgotten. That Abba hears our cries, and knows our hearts. When we delight ourselves in the Most High then He is faithful to give us the desires of our heart. {Psalm 37:4}

Press on and faint not my friends. Look for the little blessings and be renewed in His strength! 

For which cause we faint not; but though our outward man perish, yet the inward man is renewed day by day. -2 Corinthians 4:16

Are you salty?

Have you ever read the verse that talks about unsalty salt? 

Ye are the salt of the earth: but if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? it is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men. -Matthew 5:13

This verse always seemed weird to me. Maybe it's just me but I've never had unsalty salt. So it just didn't make sense to me. But recently I needed to buy some sea salt. I normally just use regular table salt, but for what ever reason this time I needed sea salt.

That sea salt made my table salt seem very unsalty! I was so shocked. On the container it said to just use the same amount you would table salt. But when I did the results were barely edible! My container of table salt had lost it's savour! Whoa!

I'd love to say I'm like super spiritual and that my mind immediately went to that verse. But nope... It was well over a month later while I was cooking dinner that the Lord brought this concept to my mind. It was almost like the Lord was saying "how salty are you Tewauna?" 

I've never really thought about it before. I just took for granted that I'm to be "salt and light". I never took into consideration my saltiness. But that is something that matters! So how do we maintain our saltiness? If we keep reading we see in verse 16 that we need to "Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven."

So that's the ticket! Good works. Doing what's right. OBEDIENCE! It never ceases to amaze me how often that is the answer. If we simply obey what the Lord says, no matter what we think or what people say, then we can continue to useful. But when we disobey we become "good for nothing". I don't want that to be me! How about you? 

What area in your life is the Lord calling you to surrender, or die to self? 

This is what it's all about!

Painting by Urban Renaissance

Today it was another day like before. We were doing a good job of sticking to our schedule and getting everything done. I was working through school work and we started doing our devotional. It was on Revelations 21:1-7 

"And I saw a new heaven and a new earth: for the first heaven and the first earth were passed away; and there was no more sea. And I John saw the holy city, new Jerusalem, coming down from God out of heaven, prepared as a bride adorned for her husband. And I heard a great voice out of heaven saying, Behold, the tabernacle of God is with men, and he will dwell with them, and they shall be his people, and God himself shall be with them, and be their God. And God shall wipe away all tears from their eyes; and there shall be no more death, neither sorrow, nor crying, neither shall there be any more pain: for the former things are passed away. And he that sat upon the throne said, Behold, I make all things new. And he said unto me, Write: for these words are true and faithful. And he said unto me, It is done. I am Alpha and Omega, the beginning and the end. I will give unto him that is athirst of the fountain of the water of life freely. He that overcometh shall inherit all things; and I will be his God, and he shall be my son."

So naturally from there we talked about salvation and how our sins keep us away from God, but that Yeshua {Jesus} came to take away our sins so that we could be with God. Well my 4 year old (she'll be 5 next month) looked at me with so much remorse in her eyes and said "I want Jesus to forgive my sins so I can be with God". 

I asked her about her sins, and she told me what they were. Not obeying, pushing her sister, etc. Then I asked her if she deserved to be away from God and I could see that it hurt her to say yes. You could see her getting it but she just didn't want to say it. Who does? That moment when you realize that you are a sinner in need of a Savior is hard for even grown ups! Finally she said "yes, I deserve to be away from God" quickly adding "but I don't want to be". She even asked me if she could pray and ask Jesus to take her sins away. I told her we'd talk about it later. 

There have been times in the past where I thought she got it. But not like this. This time it brought tears to my eyes! I had to walk away. I sent a quick message to a friend seeing if she also came to the same conclusion that I did. My friend agreed that she seemed ready. So I decided I'd talk to my hubby about it and let him handle it. In the past I've said it to him and he's said she's too young. Just let the thought stay with her. But in my heart I've always though back to Matthew 18 "... Except ye be converted, and become as little children, ye shall not enter into the kingdom of heaven. Whosoever therefore shall humble himself as this little child, the same is greatest in the kingdom of heaven."

When my husband came home for lunch I pulled him aside and told him what had happened. I was holding back tears as I recalled the look on our daughters face. I KNOW she understood, and she was serious. This time he agreed with me. based off of what I told him there was no denying it. So he said he'd pray about it and talk to her in the evening. 

After dinner he sat down with her and asked her about her day. She told him all the things she learned and what she thought was most exciting. Then he asked her about our Bible lesson today. She said "oh yea, we talked about Jesus and how he takes our sins away". Then with a little bit of frustration in her voice she added "I wanted to pray but mom told me we'd talk about it later". I didn't even think waiting would matter to her. But clearly it did. He then told her a little bit of his testimony. I sat there listening from the other room just in awe of the situation and how my prayers for my children to know the Lord from a young age were being answered. As he continued on she said "daddy, I really want to pray. I want Jesus to take my sins away." There was no stopping her. 

I sat there and listened as they prayed together, and my sweet little girl asked for Jesus to enter her heart. When they were finished she was beaming! I came in the room and she said "Mommy I prayed and Jesus took my sins away!" She was just so happy. I reminded her that it doesn't mean she'll be perfect now, but that when she messes up she still need to pray. She nodded her head in agreement and just continued smiling at me. 

In that moment I was just so humbled. If you asked me a week ago about the spiritual state of my children I would have told you I was failing. I would have told you that we try but I don't think it's sinking in. They fight, they fuss, I'm still working on first time obedience, and it's hard. But then when I least expect it, the Lord answers one of my hearts deepest desires! It's not about me. I am always going to fall short, but He is faithful! 

I know that as the years go by she will question her choice. Maybe she'll even want to rededicate herself to the Lord. But right now because of her child like faith and her heart being open to hear from the Lord, her name is written in the Lamb's book of life! No matter what may come her way that won't change, because of that not only am I rejoicing, but so are the angels!

Likewise, I say unto you, there is joy in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner that repenteth. -Luke 15:10

if you'd like to know more about what it takes to be saved please go here

When you're loosing the fight...

I'm the type of person that looks at child rearing as bringing up soldiers for the Lord. Not in a militant and aggressive type of way, but rather that my goal is to train my children to love and serve the Lord. That means I'm in a battle with the enemy. Because his goal is the exact opposite. His goal is that my children would instead only love themselves and seek to serve themselves, which in turn would leave them enslaved to him. 

Know ye not, that to whom ye yield yourselves servants to obey, his servants ye are to whom ye obey; whether of sin unto death, or of obedience unto righteousness? -Romans 6:16

You see our selfish fleshly desires lead us into bondage. How can I set my children up for that? Of course I must fight for them to be free.  For to be carnally minded is death; but to be spiritually minded is life and peace. {Romans 8:6} But when I slack off then I am failing. Which means I'm loosing the fight! That is a scary and sobering thought, and that's precisely where I have been! I mentioned before that I was struggling to get things together since the move and unfortunately it's been really hard on everyone. But what do you do when you're loosing the fight???? YOU PUT ON YOUR ARMOUR AND STAND! 

Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints... -Ephesians 6:11-18

This past week as we celebrated the feast of Sukkot, or Tabernacles, {Leviticus 23:34-36} the Lord really dealt with me. He showed me where I was failing, why I was failing, and how to fix it. So I started this week with a new resolve! Determined to get back any ground that I had given over I made a plan of action. I know that this plan is only doable in His strength because I was seriously slacking before. Not only that, we have a baby coming! Once the baby is born if I don't have a grip on things I'll be drowning even more! Which is something I most certainly don't want. 

So starting today we've starting a new schedule, that gives us goals for the day. Having a goal gives you purpose, and direction. The other thing I'm doing is making sure that I have a quiet time with the Lord TWICE a day. I know for most moms getting it in once seems like a miracle. But I'm a firm believer that we make time for what we want. So I found the time to read my Bible and get alone with the Lord. It's not always easy and sometimes it literally feels like a fight! But I need it, so I do it. That truly is the key to me being successful at training up my children, and loving my husband. 

That is my game plan and today it has gone smoothly. We may not have done everything exactly on time, but we got everything accomplished! I'm choosing to stand, and fight back, that's what you do when you're loosing!


Until next time, be strong in the Lord!

Life and all that comes with it...

Painting by Carol Marine

Well I have just been an awful blogger lately! Sorry about that. Life just seems to be a little crazy. Between pregnancy brain, low iron, and training up two young ladies, life can kind of get a little hectic.

Seems like try as we might we just haven't been able to get our acts together since the move. I don't know if it's the pregnancy, or just a normal readjustment period, because this is our first move as a family. But I'm looking forward to getting it all figured out as we move forward. 

We've started homeschooling which has been going well. I'm using Easy Peasy Homeschool because it's a free curriculum. Yay free! But with all the excitement from the fall feasts we haven't been very consistent. I think as they girls get older that I'll start after the Holy Days, or something. We'll see.

Along with struggling to just get back into a routine I've been struggling to get back into having my own quiet time with the Lord. Which is MUCH needed. I've been reading but it's not the same as that consistent uninterrupted time with Him. As a mom (really just as a Christian in general) that time is so important. This life is SO hard to do on your own. I remember seeing a tweet once that said:
"note to self, don't try to do life with out God." How true it that! We just absolutely need Him. 

So my goal is to have two quiet times a day! At first I thought that was aiming too high, but then I thought about it. I spend far too much time on facebook, reading blogs, and watching netflix. If I go to bed earlier I can get in some Bible time at night. Then if I'm going to bed earlier, I will be able to get up earlier and I'll have Bible time then as well! Hopefully this works, but if not, I'll be happy to at least get in one of those times. I'm hoping to make this a new part of my life, not just something I do for this season. Two Bible times just sounds so amazing, and the more we are in the Word the more we get to know Him! I want to be so close to my Abba that you can't meet me, with out meeting Him! 

This is the heart of our family, and what we want for our home. So we're FINALLY getting around to putting up some Bible verses! Having scripture on the wall just reminds us through the day of why we do what we do, and Who we serve. 

As of now the only one that is up is in our bedroom. We figured that's the best place to start, since it all starts with us. So now when we wake up the first thing we see in the morning is: "Arise therefore, and be doing, and the Lord be with thee." This is from 1 chronicles 22:16b, it has to do with getting the Temple built, but it spoke to us. We have so much to "be doing" and this is a constant reminder to do it, and to make sure we keep the right focus. We're planning to put more up in every room, but since my hubby is hand paining them it's going to take some time. I'll share once it's all done. 

I think that about covers everything for right now, so I'll leave you with a little bit of exciting news. I had an ultrasound and we know the baby's gender. We're having a... BOY! My hubby is over the moon, and we're all just so excited to meet the newest addition to our family! 

Until next time, be strong in the Lord!

Hello Second Trimester!

Well it is official! I am no longer in the first trimester! I am now 15 weeks along, and feeling so much better. Only I'm extremely hungry, but that's better than not keeping anything down! I'm also dealing with some iron issues, that I plan to treat with yellowdock root. I'll post more on that once I start using it. 

In addition to feeling better, I'm also finally able to read again with out feeling like the whole room is spinning! So I'm pretty excited to start tackling some of my pregnancy reading.

Another thing I'm planning to do is adopt the custom of reciting Tehillim {Psalms} during the rest of my pregnancy. The custom is to recite either all of the tehillim in a month, or all of the tehillim in a week. But I'm just going to recite the ones that are recommended for pregnant women. Which are tehillim 1, 4, 5, 8, 20, 35, 57, 93, and 108. My hope is that in reciting these daily I will begin to memorize them and use them for comfort during my delivery.

When I gave birth to my youngest I was praying the entire time. I didn't have much scripture memorized so I was just praying and calling on what I knew. But this time I'd like to be more prepared spiritually. It wasn't really until the end of my last pregnancy that I started to think of it as a spiritual experience. But really birth is Holy. All of pregnancy is. When else to we get to partner with YHVH in preforming a miracle? Normally He just does amazing things for us. But with pregnancy and childbirth there is work involved for us. It's nothing short of amazing.

For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb. I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. -Tehilim 139:13-14

Keeping Kosher

I will be the first to tell you that to eat Biblically clean you DO NOT have to buy everything kosher. In fact if you know what you're looking for, and you do most of your cooking from scratch you can completely avoid hechshers {the symbols on food that tell you if they are kosher or not}.

But in light of our almost dinner fiasco tonight, we have decided to go kosher. Now of course anything that we know to be clean we will still purchase, like cheese, but we will be making sure that the bulk of our products are hechshered.

So here's what happened. My husband purchased a bottle of sweet and sour sauce that he wanted me to use for dinner. Nothing wrong with that. Well I ended up reading the label, because we have a youngin' with allergies, and guess what I saw? CARMINE. Now if you don't know what carmine is let me just tell you that a it's unclean, and b it's gross. Carmine is a red food coloring that comes from the Cochineal bug, which is a cactus parasite.. Blech! 

Being that so many food additives are derived from rather unsavory sources, and we can't keep up with them all, we've decided to trust those whose job it is to make sure that unclean things do not get into our food. This also means I'll have to start digging into which hechshers are actually good. Because I know some rabbis believe that things that are derived from an unclean source are so far removed from the original source that they can be considered clean. We do not agree with that, nor do most Orthodox Jews, so those are the type of hechshers we will be sticking with. One hechsher that everyone is very familiar with it the OU symbol from the Orthodox Union. That's the most common one, but as I study things out I will share the other ones that I find to be valid. 

In the mean time while you're trying to figure things out READ READ READ those labels! Even if you don't keep kosher do you really want to eat a bug, just to make your food red? 

This is the law of the beasts, and of the fowl, and of every living creature that moveth in the waters, and of every creature that creepeth upon the earth: To make a difference between the unclean and the clean, and between the beast that may be eaten and the beast that may not be eaten. -Leviticus 11:46-47