What matters in life? Is it time spent with loved ones, the things we acquire, the status we reach? Or is it the time we spend with Hashem? While I've been away from blogging I've been learning a lot about my self and what really matters to me. To be really honest, I've been lonely. I felt like I didn't have a friend in the world. But as I've learned that isn't true. I have an amazing Abba that loves me and never leaves me lonely. When I feel alone its because I have left Him. Its easy to turn to the things we've always known and that are tangible for comfort. Its easy to find peace in what we see, and not in the things we don't. But it's those times when we must solely rely on our faith, that's when we find true comfort. It is in our weakness that we are made strong and it is by faith that we are able to carry on.
I think for me it's easy to get lost in the shuffle because I didn't grow up with strong faith. We had a lot of traditions but for me personally they weren't spiritually fulfilling. Now that I know what routines and traditions keep my "spiritual tank" full I still seem to drop the ball! I guess its just human nature to get lazy but I'm working on it. I discovered that when I blog I keep my self spiritually grounded and looking heavenward. Hashem made me a writer and an artist for a reason. I need to use the things He gave me to communicate with Him.
I was reading back over some of the different things I've written and I kind of inspired myself! I realized that He knows what He's doing! So I need to just chill out sometimes. I get too wrapped up in the out come of things and I miss right now. I think I've mentioned this before. But at least you know I struggle too, and sometimes with the same things repeatedly! So now here I am for the millionth time at the point of teshuva {repentance}. I'm turning back to Hashem and getting my priorities in order.
I pray that your Fall Chagim {holidays} have been blessed and that you feel refreshed and more connected to Hashem then before.
Love and Blessings,
I can empathize. I feel the same way sometimes--about being a writer and artist, and also about feeling lonely. Being home with kids can sometimes be a lonely experience. I myself need to get back on the ball with prayer and bible study. This will most likely only be possible if I wake up before my daughter. But right now the routine is that *she* wakes up first. ;)
ReplyDeleteP.S. I'm reading that book by Rebbetzin Jungreis and I'm LOVING it! I don't agree with everything theologically-speaking, but overall, the book contains SO MUCH wisdom. Thanks for "introducing" this author to me!