Ok it's confession time...
I had a terrible week. I was mean to my husband and although I worked really hard at being involved with my children, my heart wasn't in it. My girls had a fun week, and they had mommy's attention. But I was on edge, and not as patient with them as I could of been.
I tried to be nice to my hubby, I tried to just act like everything was fine. Then he'd do something like turn the TV, on when I was trying to keep it off, and I'd feel like he was the worst husband ever. Yes I know I was being completely irrational. But it seemed like no matter how hard I tried, he just couldn't do anything right. I prayed on it, I sought God on it, and I asked for strength. Nothing. I asked God to show me why I was so bitter, and to help me to forsake it. Nothing. I resolved to just smile through it........ That didn't last long.
Then one night while I was cooking dinner I was listening to a radio show on Revive Our Hearts called A God-Sized Picture of Marriage and the speaker, Nancy Leigh DeMoss, was explaining the point of marriage. She said:
"Now, I don’t know why you got married or what your hopes and expectations were that day, or what they may be today years later, but I have news—in case you haven’t discovered it already—and that is that marriage is not first and foremost about you. It’s not that you can’t enjoy a happy and blessed marriage. You can, and I believe that pleases the Lord for you to do that. But the greatest blessings of marriage come as a byproduct of seeking something else.
You see, marriage was intended by God to display in neon His covenant love. It’s supposed to be a Technicolor picture of redemption. Your marriage is supposed to point people to Christ. It’s supposed to draw them like a magnet to the gospel, to know the love of God, to see that love lived out in two imperfect people who have a great God at the heart of their marriage."
"Doth a fountain send forth at the same place sweet water and bitter? 12 Can the fig tree, my brethren, bear olive berries? either a vine, figs? so can no fountain both yield salt water and fresh. 13 Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. 14 But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. 15 This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. 16 For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. 17 But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. 18 And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace."